Saturday, November 30, 2019

The 16 Commandments of Growing Older

The 16 Commandments of Growing Older
1 - Talk to yourself, because there are times you need expert advice.
2 - Consider "In Style" to be the clothes that still fit.
3 - You don't need anger management. You need people to stop pissing you off.
4 - Your people skills are just fine. It's your tolerance for idiots that needs work.
5 - The biggest lie you tell yourself is, "I don't need to write that down. I'll remember it."
6 - You have days when your life is just a tent away from a circus.
7 - These days, "on time" is when you get there.
8 - Even duct tape can't fix stupid - but it sure does muffle the sound.
9 - Wouldn't it be wonderful if we could put ourselves in the dryer for ten minutes, then come out wrinkle-free and three sizes smaller ?
10 - Lately, You've noticed people your age are so much older than you.
11 - "Getting lucky" means walking into a room and remembering why you're there.
12 - When you were a child, you thought nap time was punishment.  Now it feels like a mini vacation.
13 - Some days you have no idea what you're doing out of bed.
14 - You thought growing old would take longer.
15 - Aging sure has slowed you down, but it hasn't shut you up.
16 - You still haven't learned to act your age, and hope you never will.

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