Thursday, December 22, 2016

Save Marinwood awarded "Truthful News"certification from the FCC.

The FCC (Federal Communications Commission) today has certified the People's Cube [Editor's Note: Save Marinwood received the same certification]as a state-approved source of "correct, truthful, authentic, forward-looking and genuine truth" that is safe to read, share, and discuss with neighbors, family, and co-workers. This confirms our leadership position among the progressive mainstream media, as our stories more often than not become reality. For bringing only the best current truth to the toiling masses of American workers, peasants, and the unwashed intelligentsia, the FCC has decorated us with the "Truthful News" seal of authenticity, which henceforth will be proudly displayed in our sidebar. 

Ever since Hillary Clinton and allied media organs alerted us about the harmful effects of "fake news," American news consumers have been dazzled and confused, not knowing what news they are allowed to read and talk about safely, and what news can put them in violation of government policies regulating the proper reading of news. 

Indignant community organizers have been demanding a radical overhaul of all media regulations, as well as a thorough recount of all information ever published since this country's founding, raising concerns that the United States with its current political system itself is a tragic mistake originating in "fake news." 

While federal judges say that the deadline for such a recount has expired more than two centuries ago, many still believe that enemies of democracy may have used "fake news" to drag the country into the Revolutionary War and trick Americans into accepting capitalism and the electoral college.

Some vocal senior activists have compared the current fake-news confusion to the debilitating panic among American food consumers who had no idea what to eat until in 1990 the FDA at last mandated the placement of Nutrition Facts Labels on all packaged products.

In a similar example of caring oversight, the FCC has adopted a new certification system that separates all news into two clear categories: "fake news" and "truthful news." Additionally, a new law will require all media to display FCC labels to identify their classification. This will alert readers in advance whether they are looking at a genuine government-approved source of must-read truthful news, or they're reading some idiotic concoction of a madman with an unhealthy fixation on the so-called rights to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. Obviously, anything based on such a false, backward premise qualifies as "fake news."

Thus, and similar alt-right media outlets that have been found guilty of misleading the American public into voting for Donald Trump, will be henceforth obligated to display the shameful "Fake News" seal of disapproval. It is only fitting that their false narrative of capitalism and American exceptionalism will be identified with a label similar to the Surgeon General's cancer warnings on cigarette packaging. This is yet another example of caring government oversight that proves critics wrong.

Until all news sources have been properly certified and labeled with FCC badges, readers are advised to follow this helpful chart.

In other news. Hillary Clinton has suggested to counter "fake news" with a government newspaper called "Truth" ("Pravda" for Russian speakers).
See more at

No comments:

Post a Comment